15 July 2012

30 Shades of Nonsense: Random Notes, Thoughts and Guacamole

  1. Haven’t written anything in a month. Creatively constipated. Need an enema.
  2. Beginning July 16, I will be embarking on The Quest.
  3. Louis C.K. is currently the funniest thing on the tube.
  4. Email from the husband --
Husband: Mmmmm, I’m gonna Higgs your bosun.
Me: Is that code for something?
Husband: Mmmmm, I’m gonna code your something.
(note: Higgs bosun is a sub-atomic particle, also referred to as the God particle.)
  1. Trader Joe’s has grass fed, New Zealand ground beef on sale for $5.99. Do you know how much of an awesome price that is for grass fed anything?
  2. Best thing about summer: overabundance of avocados. Why? GUACAMOLE, that’s why!
  3. The husband is suffering from a severe case of wanderlust and proposed taking a month off to traipse around Europe. I heartily agreed.
  4. Afternoon light (around 5 or 6pm) creates the most beautiful long shadows.
  5. Most listened to this week: Townes van Zandt, Them Crooked Vultures, O Mio Babbino Caro
  6. Songs guaranteed to make me choke up every time: Rolling Stones’ “Wild Horses” and Tom Waits’ “San Diego Serenade”.
  7. I don’t get 50 Shades of Grey. I read the first 15 pages on Amazon and... let’s just say, I would also use a pseudonym.
  8. I love Amazon.com.
  9. Hollywood needs more women directors like Kathryn Bigelow.
  10. My love of movies exceeds the heat generated in a large hadron collider (allegedly 10 million billion degrees Celsius).
  11. Currently reading a really crappy script by a fellow writer; vacillating between giving brutally honest feedback or merely adding to his delusion. (And I’m not being snooty; this script is truly awful.)
  12. Hey, overly endowed girl. Just because it’s hot out is not a justification to expose your chichis. Leave something to the imagination, for the love of everything decent in this world.
  13. I think the movie-going audience is now ready for a Thelma and Louise reboot.
  14. Watching kittens play has been medically proven to lower your blood pressure.*
  15. Drinking wine has also been proven to do the same as #18.*
  16. Not watching the news has also... etc... etc.... refer to #18.*
  17. Last films watched: The Hurt Locker, Clueless, Shame.
  18. A phrase that I wish would gain in popularity - “Pish posh”.
  19. The Oxford comma - yea or nay?
  20. The aughts’ cultural zeitgeist - a vacuous black hole or appropriately zeitgeistian?
  21. Contemplating undertaking Project 365. But that’s, like, a lot of photos so contemplating a (much) truncated version instead: Project 30.
  22. Random Facebook conversation:
J: So, is it love or hate when an animal rubs its butt across your pillows?
S: Depends if they leave a skidmark or not.
J: No skidmark.
S: Then love.
J: Smelly love.
S: Love stinks.
J: Apparently.

  1. The elements that make up our bodies are the same elements that make up the universe; ergo, we are of the universe.
  2. Countdown: 5 months, 8 days, 3 hours, 27 minutes until Scotland (as of 7/12/12 @ 2:49pm)
  3. Uh....
  4. Whatever happened to David Chappelle?

*These statements have not been medically proven to be true.

1 comment:

  1. It's too bad you don't live in LA... ~_~

    3. Louis CK is Hilarious! Says so right in his special. Kevin Hart is my new obsession, but I'm banned from media, so I don't know if he's still alive.
    5. WHAT?! That's a crazy price for grass-fed meat!
    6. We have an avocado tree in the backyard and 14 avocados in the kitchen.
    10. Wild Horses is a sad song and a great karaoke number.
    11. I made my roommate listen to me read a bootlegged 50 Shades of Grey, because he said it couldn't be that bad if so many people liked it. It should be called 50 Mentions of Long Fingers. Or 50 Blushes a Day.
    13. Hollywood DOES need more female directors. We should get some that aren't crazy well-connected to rally behind.
    15. It depends. Do you value your friendship and do you think he can ever improve?
    16. I don't have big boobs, but maybe when it's hot outside, they get really sweaty and then you get embarrassing boob-sweat stains.
    18. I had a kitten, and she turned into a stupid cat. Just kidding, I never saw her as a kitten, damnit.
    30. He didn't want fame to eat him alive, so he stopped being famous and started doing stand-up again... I believe.

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